I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize