I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
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