Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Randomize