This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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