I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize