no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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