great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
