chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
