Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize