Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
