it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
