I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize