porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
