If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
