speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize