He had one of those small greek statue penises
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I love having hate sex.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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