im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize