thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
