I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
my poor anus
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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