i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
