I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
