My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize