id be glad to
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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