how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
