I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
