Hey man sorry I got all grabby
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
