is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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