Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
