Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
