tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
