I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize