She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Houston, we have a squirter
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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