We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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