Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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