dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
she told me i tasted like america
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
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