I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
