i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
Randomize
