If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
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