Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Oh god it's open bar.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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