Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize