My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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