Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
sarcasm needs its own font
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
