maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize