You made me cry and you don't even care
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Randomize
