i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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