My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
