come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
