that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
