question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
You are the jesus of drinking
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
