She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
